On the ninth day of Christmas...

...my true love gave to me...

NINE EYELINERS!!

YSL Liquid Eyeliner

Benefit BADgal

Vincent Longo Duo Eye Pencil

Smashbox Cream Eyeliner Palette

NARS Glitter Liner

Trish McEvoy Classic Eye Pencil

Prescriptives Softlining Pencil

Chantecaille Luminous Eye Liner

Jemma Kidd Define Stay Put Eyeliner

eight night creams a-creaming,

seven bronzers bronzing,

six blushes blushing,

five metallic compacts,

four leave-in conditioners,

three hand soaps,

two lash tints,

and a palette of lip paints.

photos courtesy of sephora.com and neimanmarcus.com.

On the eighth day of Christmas...

...my true love gave to me...

EIGHT NIGHT CREAMS!!

Lancome Absolue Premium Bx Night Recovery Cream

Bliss An Ounce Of Prevention PM

Decleor Aromessence Angelique Night Cream

Elizabeth Arden Good Night's Sleep Restoring Cream

Neutrogena Visibly Even Healthy Skin Night Concentrate
Clinique Repairwear Intensive Night Cream Very Dry Formula

Bobbi Brown Overnight Cream

Olay Night of Olay Firming Cream

seven bronzers bronzing,

six blushes blushing,

five metallic compacts,

four leave-in conditioners,

three hand soaps,

two lash tints,

and a palette of lip paints.

photos courtesy of sephora.com, neimanmarcus.com, drugstore.com and beauty.com.

On the seventh day of Christmas...

...my true love gave to me...

SEVEN BRONZERS!!

Tarte Mineral Powder in Park Avenue Princess

Stila Sun

LORAC Cheek Duo in Hot and Spicy

Cargo Bronzing Powder in Medium

Guerlain Terracotta

Nars Blush/Bronzer Duo

Benefit Hoola

six blushes blushing,

five metallic compacts,

four leave-in conditioners,

three hand soaps,

two lash tints,

and a palette of lip paints.


photos courtesy of sephora.com and beauty.com.

On the sixth day of Christmas...

...my true love gave to me...

SIX CREAM BLUSHES!

Becca Creme Blush

Stila Convertible Color

Tarte Cheek Stain

Paula Dorf Cheek Color Cream

Delux Flush Stick

Nars The Multiple

five metallic compacts,

four leave-in conditioners,

three hand soaps,

two lash tints,

and a palette of lip paints.

photos courtesy of sephora.com.

On the fifth day of Christmas...

...my true love gave to me...

FIVE METALLIC COMPACTS!

Guerlain Pressed Powder Compact

Yves Saint Laurent Palette Signes D'Orient Collector

Stila Illuminating Powder Foundation

Prada Beauty Compact Makeup

Chantecaille Compact Makeup Powder Foundation

four leave-in conditioners,

three hand soaps,

two lash tints,

and a palette of lip paints.

photos courtesy of sephora.com and niemanmarcus.com

On the fourth day of Christmas...

...my true love gave to me...

FOUR LEAVE-IN CONDITIONERS!

Kiehl's Leave-In Conditioners

Ojon Leave-In Glossing Creme

Korres Natural Products Almond Proteins Leave-On Conditioner

Carol's Daughter Black Vanilla Leave-In Conditioner

three hand soaps,

two lash tints,

and a palette of lip paints.

photos courtesy of sephora.com and kiehls.com

On the third day of Christmas...

...my true love gave to me...

THREE HAND SOAPS!

Molton Brown Naran Ji Liquid Hand Soap

Savannah Bee Company Liquid Honey Hand Soap in Blackberry

L'Occitane Olive Harvest Daily Hand Wash

two lash tints,

and a palette of lip paints.

photos courtesy of moltonbrown.co.uk, savannahbee.com, and usa.loccitane.com

On the second day of Christmas...

...my true love gave to me...

TWO LASH TINTS!

Neutrogena Clean Lash Tint

Jemma Kidd Lasting Tint

and a palette of lip paints.

Photos courtesy of drugstore.com and bergdorfgoodman.com

On the first day of Christmas...

...my true love gave to me...

... a palette of lip paints.

Laura Mercier Micro Mini Lip Paint Palette.

Welcome to the final twelve days before Christmas. In the spirit of giving, I'm giving you all my favorite incentives to go out and buy a little something for yourselves.

Sung to the tune of "Twelve Days of Christmas." Duh.

photo courtesy of Sephora.com.

A Strategic Deployment

Yesterday, I set out to wash a few of my makeup brushes as they were, um, FILTHY.

Typically, I use Johnson & Johnson's Baby Shampoo. You know, the ubiquitous clear yellow shampoo everyone's parents used on them when they were little. I cannot stomach the thought of buying special brush cleaner which I know is probably just rubbing alcohol in a spray bottle. But on this particular morning, I remembered that I threw it out because things with the word "baby" on them freak my boyfriend out.

In a rush, I grabbed my now useless bottle of L'Oreal Color Vive shampoo and scrub-a-dub-dub, my Trish McEvoy foundation brush in the tub. Because I figured that cheap shampoo is probably all the same.

When I grabbed them this morning to apply my makeup, I noticed that they were unbelieveably soft! They felt great on my skin (and clean!).

So the bottom line? Color Vive, crap on my hair, but great on my makeup brushes!

I'm just kidding about my boyfriend and the baby shampoo...I think I just ran out of space and forgot why I had it.

Self Esteem? Shot to Hell.

I've always said that in New York, nothing can make you feel fatter or poorer than a trip to Barney's.

Well, in D.C., nothing makes you feel more out of shape and more trite than slogging though a workout on the elliptical trainer reading Town and Country and catching the last hour of The Today Show than doing all the above next to George Stephanopoulos going a hundred steps per minute while blazing through a stack of national newspapers.

I guess it's time to buy some cuter workout clothes, some DeTocqueville, and start hitting the gym more often...

Don't Ask, Just Run

For all the DC metro types....



The baby branch of Neiman Marcus, Cusp, is having a designer jeans sale. Buy one, get the second half off.

Now a designer jeans sale is about as rare as spotting Trent Lott with bedhead hair, so I advise you drop everything, call in sick (just say you ate at the Subway on 1st St. SE or at a Taco Bell on the campaign trail) and hightail it over to Tyson's Corner.

graphic taken from an email which they told me to blog about, text around, and generally scream about it from the rooftops.

Caveat Emptor

I have a confession to make. Something I have not yet shared with you all.

My father is a plastic surgeon.

So my first answer is, no, I have not had any work done.

I do have a line on my forehead left by a year of 8:30 am organic chemistry that I am dying for him to Botox though.

Anyways, I know a lot of plastic surgeons and I know a fair amount about plastic surgery. Which is why I feel ok commenting on the recent New York Times article about how more out-of-scope doctors are starting to offer cosmetic procedures like Botox, Restylane and lasers.

The article focuses on two OB/GYNs who opened up a med-spa franchise in Brooklyn after being trained by the company in administering injectables and laser treatments. Their arguments for why: it's more "relaxing" than delivering babies at 2 am, their malpractice insurance is way cheaper and it's "very satisfying."

There is a growing trend in medicine to offer cosmetic service either in lieu of the practice you were trained in or in addition to your other work. Since the profit margin on these procedures, particularly on Botox, is extremely slim, these doctors are relying primarily on volume to bring in the cash they need.

Let me tell you something about your face. It's anatomy is extremely complicated. Not only are there like a zillion tiny nerves and muscles that doctors spend years learning about, every face is different. Don't even get me started on letting someone monkey around near your eyes with a paralytic agent when they don't know the anatomy!

Bottom line: administering Botox is not the same as giving a flu shot. There is an art to doing these procedures that they don't teach at a one day seminar in Arizona.

The other problem is that most of these doctors aren't trained to handle problems when they occur. Nine times out of ten, everything will go fine, wrinkles are gone, everyone is happy. But that one time something goes wrong and the shit hits the fan, I would want doctor who was trained to handle problems above my waist.

So my advice, choose your doctor wisely. Make sure they know what they are doing and were trained to deal with bad outcomes. There are no bargains to be had when it comes to your health or your beauty.

Now about those dermatologists doing liposuction....

Ask CapHillBarbie: Go with the Snow

Let's face it. I'm kind of a fair weather girl. Having spent a few formative years in Southern California seriously ruined my ability to handle inclement weather. A rain spell can send me in to a serious depressive fog and the thought of not being able to wear my peep toe Louboutins at the office Christmas party makes me so mad that I would totally call NOAA and try to demand that they fix the weather immediately if my staff director hadn't cut off my phone privileges.

But when this question hit my inbox this time, I was actually prepared to answer with something more substantial than "stay inside!!!"

Hey Barbie-

I have a question. I'm not sure if you've heard, but the Midwest is getting slammed with the first big snow storm of the winter. Now, I'm a chicago girl, so I know how to handle inclement weather. BUT, year after year, I have yet to figure out how to go outside and not get the bottom 4 inches of my pants soaked! Then, today, I hear that Seattle broke the 73 year record for rainfall this season and I thought to myself: There has got to be a way- We should no not have to change our pants every time we get home from a rainy/snowy day! In the name of fashion-- and good sense--- I beg you, HELP!!

Best regards, A very cold (and wet) chicago girl

Ok, stay inside!!!

No, seriously, I understand that not everyone can go into hibernation for six months while we wait for winter to pass us by. Also, not everyone has underground tunnels and a little subway to take you around your office complex.

I often saw people trudging about in DC during the winter with their...shudder...Uggs. This is NOT AN OPTION. Nope, not-uh. I get it, they're warm. But they are not waterproof and they are so ugly they can turn people to stone with one glance.

I have also seen the colorful rainboots with the cutesy "critters" splashed all over them. They are ok, but typically not lined and kinda look like rain could fall in the tops and STILL get your pants wet.

My solution? I'm sitting here at my desk today on this rainy Friday in my brand new Aigle boots rubber riding boots.

They rock.

Knee high, totally badass looking, lined, waterproof, warm and big enough to allow for warm cozy socks and pants tuckage.

I suggest that for these dire situations with the wet and the muck, you go straight to the source.

Get on LL Bean for the classic duck boot and look up the Scottish Hunter boots and get the real deal. While there are some more trendy alternatives on JCrew.com, I believe that functionality and utilitarianism is more stylish than all that.

However, I fell in love with the Aigle boots for the simple reason that they look awesome. And waterproof. And indestructible.

Oh, they are also French and come in calf widths.

Tuck away and stay dry chicas!

pictures to come later! I promise!

Bergdorf Bazaar

The beauty department at Bergdorf's can often remind me of a very clean and shiny version of the bazaar in Marrakesh.

Or at least how I imagine the bazaar in Marrakesh to be.

You arrive via escalator and there are salespeople stationed at every turn to try to tempt you into a makeup chair and fork over your credit card. As you wander through the counters, they call at you like the Harpies:

"Can I interest you in anything?"

"Can I help you find anything?"

"Would you like to try...?"

It takes a lot of discipline to try to just look around. First, avoid eye contact with the salesfolk. They can smell weakness. Second, I always try to cut them off with a swift "I'm just looking."

Although it probably comes out a little shrill at the time.

It can be a little nerve racking to be down there, but DAMN! Bergdorf's has the absolute, bar none, best beauty department west of the Mississippi.

Okay, I don't even know what they've got west of the Mississippi, but I like saying it. And it can't be better. There. I said it again.

On a recent visit, I was scouting out Jemma Kidd's newish line (I loooove the hot pink packaging like it was by own child) when my mother announces that she needs a new lipstick.

So I suggested Cle de Peau, for reasons which are clearly NOT selfless. While my mother picked out a beautiful pinky nude color, I picked up a little finders fee in the way of the Eye and Lip Compact III.

Look at it.



















It's so pretty.

The compact comes in a stunning shining navy case with a little plush bag (like a blankie!) and contains three eyeshadows, a lip stain and a lip gloss. The shadows are very sheer, but go on smoothly and have unbelieveable shimmer. The stain is also pretty light and requires lots of layering, but is intensified by the sparkly pink gloss.

Oh also, it comes with a little pad applicator for the eyeshadows (a little whatever in my opinion) and a mini double sided retractable lip brush! It's so cute I just want to cry.

Now, the price of this little baby could make you weep, but guess what? Pearl onions? Peeled about a thousand of those last week. Brussel sprouts? Make them baby and for 15 hungry people, I cleaned them. Yup. That's right. I earned my Cle de Peau compact the hard way.

But at least I didn't have to haggle with the gracious saleslady who sold it to me.

image courtesy of my boyfriend's adorable camera and my crappy photography skills.

Not Just for Cheap Wine Any More

I'm a big fan of Trader Joe's.

Big Fan.

I'm a big fan of their mini chocolate peanut butter cups. I'm also a big fan of their four dollar wine.

Although my dentist is not, see: need for whitening toothpaste.

On a recent stroll through the store, I noticed and purchased a bright orange tube of their Mango & Honey Shaving Cream.

Since I have been using Skintimate since I was 13, supplemented by whatever my boyfriend is using at the time, this was quite different.

First, there is no foaming. This is more like a cream or body lotion. There wasn't as much stuff, but it did clog my razor a little and didn't wash away as easily as I would have liked.

Second, it did leave my legs feeling far more moisturized than previous products, for longer. Especially since I forgot to put on lotion (which is quickly becoming NOT an option, given the icy new temperatures and the moisture-sucking heat in my office) I was doubly impressed by the moisturizing aspect.

Third, it smells FAN-freaking-TASTIC. Running a close second to the Oscar Blandi Jasmine hair serum (seriously, they don't pay me. i wish). The smell is really great and not that fake fruity crappy smell that screams "GIRLY."

So, honestly, I think the smell alone is worth spending the extra seconds to get the excess off my razor, with the moisturizing as an added bonus. Also some nice features: it's vegetarian and unisex, although I don't plan on eating it and I can't picture my boyfriend giving up his Gillette for this.

Now, Trader Joe's is notorious for having something one day and then never stocking it again, so pick up a tube soon if you see it, and don't forget the Four-Buck Chuck.

PS. I'm not the only one who loves TJs, check out Monkey Posh's post on 5 reasons to love the place.

Gettin' Kinda Spendy

I don't know if it's all the cheap beer flowing around the Hill since the Democrats won (Republicans like to hide the 12 year old Macallen from their staff) or the promise of the influx of all that new blood up here, but I have gotten the itch to get some nice new makeup.

Which, honestly, is nothing new to me.

But the difference here is that I want to buy something pricey. Something worth the effort of spending time in a department store talking to salespeople. Something I can be proud to show off on my makeup tray or brag to my friends that it's just the "only thing I can wear anymore!!"

I'm contemplating getting the Cle de Peau concealer.

Oh yes. This baby clocks in with a price tag that would make a defense contractor swoon, outpricing my regular concealer by approximately 500%.

But it is also the stuff of legend.

Routinely mentioned in magazine copy as the best concealer you can buy (if you can afford it, of course) and recently mentioned as Alexis Bledel's favorite in Lucky Magazine. (Fine!! I just want to be Rory on Gilmore Girls. Sue me.)

But I have doubts.

First, is it REALLY worth the price of 19.04 double tall skim lattes from Starbucks?

Second, if I plan on spending that much money on something, shouldn't it ADD color to my face instead of blending it all in?

Third, can I truly expect anything to cover up the dark undereye circles which are bound to show up when I spend all of next January planning hearings?

Fourth, do you think the lady at the Cle de Peau counter would give me enough free swag for buying it to offset some of the cost?

Now, I have gotten a few other items from Cle de Peau and they are great (more to come in upcoming posts) but the balanced-budget girl in me balks just a little.

Help me out! Has anyone tried it? Is it worth my big splurge?

I'm thinking I may just have to pretend I work on Wall Street and just got a six-figure bonus, instead of Independence Ave and stealing binder clips from the government...

Walk the Line

It's not easy being a woman sometimes.

Especially when you live in a place like Washington.

Men can roll out of bed, put on a blue button down and a pair of khakis and people think they are the second coming of John Kennedy.

But for women, there is a thin line between wanting to look good and wanting to be taken seriously.

Dress in stylish clothes, wear makeup, blow out your hair and people think you are a vapid moron who clearly takes her appearance more seriously than her brain. Also, you might end up on the wrong side of the door of the cloakroom, if you know what I mean.

Buuuttt, dress down and wear coke bottle glasses and no makeup and no one wants to look at you or talk to you (unless it's behind your back).

Now, I know that I am not the first person (by a long shot) to realize this, but it is something I deal with on a daily basis and I think about it a lot.

So on Tuesday I was watching the election coverage of Hillary Clinton in New York and I noticed that she looked a little different, and it wasn't just that I-just-won-in-a-landslide glow that she had. I couldn't put my finger on it though.

Then the next day I received my copy of New York Magazine (yes, I still read this diligently every single week, it's so dishy! I love it.) with Hillary on the cover and it hit me.

She was wearing the most fabulous shade of dark purple eyeshadow.



Yes, gorgeous eggplant with just a hint of gold shimmer. And it made her look great. And it was heartening to see a women in politics walk the line between looking beautiful and being smart.

Oh, and I read the article too...because I care about things other than just beauty of course.






But seriously, if anyone knows what shade that is, TELL ME!!

I Promise to Only Do this Every Two Years

VOTE!!!

Seriously.

Ask Capitol Hill Barbie: The Brow Beating Edition

Wow, you actually sent me some questions. This is awesome. I honestly thought I would have to make up some more questions and pass them off as reader questions.

So, while I probably have no business offering advice to anyone on anything, here goes!

Two of the questions I received dealt specifically with eyebrow issues. This is a topic to which I am relatively new, but have recently had some experience.

A little background: I have what might be the palest eyebrows ever. Not to drag out the old "Paul Bettany as the albino in The Da Vinci Code" analogy again, but for reals, yo! I think something went wrong between when I was younger and my hair was much more (naturally) blonde, and my eyebrows matched. Well, guess what? My hair got darker but eyebrows remained persistently invisible.

When ever I go to a makeup counter to submit to the spackling by another, the first thing the makeup artist does is comment on my eyebrows. Apparently they frame your face! You have to make them dark! Here is another product I must buy! Half the time, when I am undercaffinated (cough, cough, hungover) and my self-esteem tank is low (AH-choo, forgot to put on makeup in hangover stupor) I buy what ever they are hawking. If I'm feeling a little more with it, I get rebellious and think "makeup artist, please! I can do this crap myself" and walk away feeling smug.

However, my commitment to doing all things high maintenance and beautifying for this blog has lead me to some pleasant surprises...

Miss Informed asks: "I have a very round face and thick eyebrows. How do I determine how thin they should be plucked/waxed? I love the thinner look but I'm afraid it would make my face look even more round. Any suggestions?"

Well, first, I feel it is my duty to tell you that apparently full eyebrows are IN! Just look at one of my new favorite shows, Ugly Betty. But seriously, I happen to think a thin eyebrow can make one look a little surprised, y'know? And while that might be fine look for a staffer who maybe comes back from lunch on a Friday to find that his boss has quit, the door locked and the nameplate off the door, it might not be something you want to sport all the time.

I have seen those kits that have eyebrow stencils that you can hold up, fill in with a pencil and see how they look on you. However, I'm not a big fan of spending a buttload of money on something that does get fully used.

I would rather buy my six thousandth pink lip gloss.

So here is my suggestion. Seek help. At least on the first try.

I used to be from the "screw eyebrow waxers! have tweezers, will pluck myself" school. So every once in a while, I would pluck like six hairs, get annoyed by my extremely low pain threshold and quit.

So, I went to a waxer. It hurt like POO!! Again, I am a SUPER wuss when it comes to pain. I also have really pale skin that turned bright red after the wax and then promptly broke out.

Awesome.

Needless to say, I needed a new strategy. So, after hearing about threading in the Going Out Gurus Chat in the Washington Post (oh, please, like the government gets anything done from 1 to 2 pm on a Thursday) I decided to give it a shot.

I picked Threads in downtown DC (located next to a pyschic! SWEET! can she tell me if I will get a job with a committee chairman in January?). The woman who did my brows was great. The pain was actually pretty minimal, although there was some redness in my albino face afterwards.

I got a little hyper about them being too thin, but since threading is very precise, she was very good about just taking off a little, then asking me what I thought. Also, these people do this for a living, and they have a pretty good idea of what looks good on what faces.

So here are my next steps for you:

First, try penciling in a thin brow with a dark eyeliner and see if it looks freakish. You can try using the stencils at Sephora until the staff starts to yell...then run like the wind or lie and say you were planning on buying that godawfully expensive shower head filter by Jonathan Antin to shame them. Then run like the wind.

Second, seek out a waxer or threader near you. Explain that you are thinking of going thinner, but gradually. Bring hydrocortisone cream and concealer.

Third, remember, natural always looks better than unnatural, so keep your brows a little full because it probably suits you.

Says the girl with the highlighted hair, painted nails, bare legs in 40 degree weather in 4 inch heels.

Jen asked: "I'm dying to know: What's the best product I can use to "fill in" my eyebrows without making them look drawn on? I have very thin eyebrows, light brown, and currently just use pencil. Is there a better way? The pencil wears off, and looks fake."

Yeah, I know this one. Where the lady at the counter says that a pencil is best because you can draw in individual hairs. Yeah....riiiightt. Because a pencil is sharp enough and I'm talented enough to draw in EXTRA EYEBROW HAIRS every morning? Like I'm Pissaro over here or something with tons of extra time built into my morning routine.

The best solution I have found is the Trish McEvoy Brow Gel. (I use the "Light Brown" color, but for some unknown reason, this seems to be unavailable online) I find that it makes my eyebrows darker and the hairs fuller which seems to let people know that I actually HAVE eyebrows. Also, it keeps my eyebrows locked into a groomed shape, even when I start rubbing my eyes to stay awake at some particularly long markup sessions.

So, I have done a little research to come up with some alternative eyebrow gels to suit your fancy. I have not included any clear gels because they always smack of hooey...

Anastasia Brow Gel - three shades from the woman who is supposedly the Michael Jordan of eyebrows. Raven haired girls seem SOL from this one though.

Benefit Speed Brow - again, three colors, but the dark one looks good for brunettes, the blonde shade looks a little funky though.

Bourjois Eyebrow Mascara - you've got to love that they just call this what it is. Best color selection so far, including an auburn shade for the redheaded stepchildren among us.

Sephora Lash & Eyebrow Mascara - The blonde shade is a little funky, and the brown is pretty reddish, but priced lower than most of the others here, could be good for someone just testing.

Stila Brow Polish - excellent range of colors, sleek silver tube.

Dior DiorShow Brows - Best dark brown of the bunch, but apparently only at Sephora. Damn them!!

Lancome Modele Sourcils Brow Groomer - Famous for their mascaras, maybe it gets better above the eyelid.

Bobbi Brown Natural Brow Shaper and Hair Touch-Up - I take it back, this one has the best color selection.

So...try some of these out and let me know what you think. Or, if you have experience with these gels, share! Or if you think brows stink, share too! Also, if anyone knows why Trish McEvoy Brow Gel is only available in clear now, please let me know...

Calling All Q's!!

Okay. That's it. I can only make up so many questions one my own.

And by that I mean all two of the questions I made up. That's right. Two. Count 'em. One. Two. It's not as easy as you may think.

I would like to make "Ask Capitol Hill Barbie" a more regular feature here so here is the directive:

Bring it on.

Email me any questions you may have about beauty, fashion, life in DC, life on the Hill, how beauty and fashion may be affected by upcoming Congressional races, whatever your little hearts desire.

Gimme some Q's, and I promise some A's.

Coordinated Effort?

In Washington, it's virtually impossible to escape the shadow of Election Day. While the rest of the country gets excited about dressing like tramps (that's what the Today Show called them, I crap you not!) and eating FAR too much candy, the D.C. metro area gets all hot and bothered about political jokes and polling numbers.

As for me?

Well, I'm pissed off that Almay can't seem to make a makeup remover to take off their OWN mascara.

Maybe Zogsby should start calling people about this hot button issue!!

A while back, I reviewed a bunch of mascaras and settled on Tarte's Lights, Camera, Lashes! as a favorite daytime mascara and began using Almay's Oil-Free Makeup Remover Pads to excellent effect.

I was originally seduced by the bold claims (Oil free!! America's Number 1 Eye Makeup Remover Brand!! Good for contact wearers!!) and was impressed by how easily it removed the mascara and shadow without any rubbing or pulling of eyelashes or burning of the eyes. So when the Tarte mascara hit the end of its three month lifespan, I picked up a tube of Almay's One Coat Triple Effect Waterproof Mascara.

I was hoping to maximize the efficacy of the makeup remover by coordinating the brands, but, much like a government where all branches are controlled by the same party, it was a disaster.

The mascara itself was a letdown. Good darkening, but much clumping and smudging. I came home with circles under my eyes and specks near my eyebrows. The remover seemed totally ineffectual! I rubbed and smeared and pulled, but the mascara refused to go anywhere but under my eyes and clumped at the roots of my lashes.

Honestly, it took a full two days to get this stuff off my eyes, and I think that's only because my eyelashes fell out.

Needless to say, I'm back to Tarte mascara removed with the Almay remover pads. I'm also going to go back to eating my Halloween cupcake, provided at a staff pumpkin decorating contest paid for with YOUR tax dollars.

Think about that when you go to the polls.

Out, Out, Damned Spot!

You know those electric fence thingamabobs people in the suburbs have for their dogs? It's like this laser that reacts with a contraption on the dog's collar to give him a shock every time he tries to get out of the yard. Eventually, the dog learns about the shocks and stays in the yard away from cars or neighborhood small children.

Yeah, if someone could figure out how to rig one of these up to give me a shock ever time I try to go into a Sephora, that would be awesome.

The other day on a government-sponsored day off, I wandered in to "just look around."

All together now, YEAH RIGHT.

The plan was to check out theBalm's Stainiac, a lip stain I had seen in a recent issue of Lucky Magazine. Also, if people could keep me away from this magazine, that would also be nice. It seems to trigger all kinds of cravings to be like the current Lucky Girl.

I was in the market for a stain for a few reasons.

One: Due to high wind velocity, the whipping of hair around seems to get stuck in all manner of lip glosses.

Two: The dark berry colors seem to fit in well with the fall color schemes and lipstick like this seems to scare me for some reason.

Three: While I am a total lip gloss fiend of the highest magnitude, I can actually be quite lazy about reapplying, and I was hoping a stain compensate for my inattention to this area.

Fourth: Oh, please, like I really have any excuses?

So off I went. I liked the Stainiac, especially in the Prom Queen color, but something was lacking. I began wandering.

I dismissed Benetint, as I don't enjoy having to use my fingers to apply the stain, although I was tempted by the Pocket Pal, I forged forward.

The next group of stains that interested me were the Bourjois Bons Baisers de Paris. This is an actual lip stain pen that you draw on your mouth and then go on your merry way. They had a variety of colors, which was really nice, but the name had me a bit troubled. While un baiser can be a kiss, which is how I'm sure they intended it, it can also mean something far dirtier. And like to Orbitz gum chick, I like to keep my mouth clean.

I was also a little concerned that the pen-esque delivery method would be confusing to my boyfriend and that I would come home some day to find him trying to do the Post crossword with it.

So I meandered over to the Tarte counter and finally hit paydirt. I picked up the Rise & Shine Plumping Lip Shine and called off the search. the dual-ended lip gloss contains a stain on one side and a clear bright lip gloss on the other side. I chose the Pink color, instead of the cherry red and am loving the results. Together, they deliver a deep pink color with high shine that makes me look much more awake (cause, man, do I need that!)

The stain looks great on it own with a little slick of Rosebud salve, and the gloss looks good on it's own as well. My only complaint is that the "plumping" effect translates into a little lip burning when I first put it on, which is not super pleasant, especially since I have no interest in "plumping" anything on my body.

The dual sidedness is a really nice touch, as I can now fit it in my evening purse and have multiple options without needing my entire arsenal of lip glosses.

The best part? The stain lasts, but comes off relatively easily by the end of the day. Because scrubbing and scraping is very unbecoming.

Scratch 'N Sniff

When I was little, I had this book about ancient Egypt that explained that the women were obsessed with fragrance (yeah, a lack of running water and soap would make me start thinking up ways to cover up the funk too). They used to make these cones of scented oils that they would wear on their heads when they went out to parties and they would slowly melt all night, keeping the women smelling rockin' as they danced the night away.

Ok, fine, I editorialized a little on that last part.

But those ancient Egytians had some smart ideas. Those of you who are faithful readers will know that I am a big big fan of the Oscar Blandi Jasmine Hair Serum. A tiny drop gives my hair a nice sheen and tames some flyaways without making me look like I got doused in canola. It also smells AWESOME.

Wait, I want to repeat that. YUH-mmy. If you think I'm just making this up now, you are wrong! I have evidence to prove it! See...I talked about how much I liked it here and here too.

The problem with the serum is that the smell never really lingers, and since making a cone out of it and waiting for the oils to drip down over my head every day probably wouldn't fly in the cloakroom, I started thinking of alternatives.

Then! I read a recent Lucky Magazine where Alexis Bledel talked about how she used her favorite jasmine scented lotion as a perfume.

Wait! Bandwagon! I want to get on you!!

So I began the hunt in earnest for a jasmine lotion that mimicked the Oscar Blandi serum smell.

Many lotions were sniffed. Many made me gag. Things were slathered and smoothed. Then my boyfriend started gagging. But I finally arrived at a winner.

Red Flower's Indian Jasmine Moisturizing Lotion.

It rocks. It smells Good. That's right, with a capital G. The lotion itself is also very nice, sinks in quickly and doesn't leave me feeling like a walked around all day with a big cone of oily fragrance on my head or anything.

The best part? The good folks at Blue Mercury in Georgetown gave me three generous sample sized packets while I wait for it to be reordered. (That's my shout-out to good customer service for the day.)

Project Runway: Finale, Part 2

Or as I like to call it, a totally moot recap, because you all already know who wins.

Previouslies: Seriously people, why are you watching if you don't know what happened before this? Oh fine. Laura accused Jeffrey of cheating, while everyone else made clothes.

Onwards!

Tim calls Jeffrey on his product placement phone and tells him that they are getting IRS on Jeffrey's ass and auditing that crapola out of his receipts. Tim also informs Jeffrey that there is no evidence that he paid someone to do the pleating on these cute little shorts that he has. Apparently there are people who specialize in pleating things for designers. Who knew?? I'm totally seeking one of those people out and getting something pleated.

So, Tim tells Jeffrey to have this House O' Pleats come up with a receipt pronto and fax it over STAT! Jeffrey laments that this pleat place is like Sanford and Son, at which point the theme song gets totally stuck in my head. They are unable to forge a receipt, get to a Kinko's and make things happen for Jeffrey, so he is SOL and knows it. You can tell because he starts making a new skirt. It's like my friend who bakes when she gets stressed out, or my friend who drinks when he gets over worked...ok...nevermind.

Finally, Tim arrives and tells everyone to gather round to hear the verdict. In measured tones and words that make who ever edits the misleading scene clips for next week salivate, Tim announces that Jeffrey certainly DID do all his own sewing. BUT! He does not have a chicken-scratch receipt for the shorty-shorts and he went over budget by a few hundred dollars. Dude?!? What was he thinking?

Well, whatever, then Uli clutches Jeffrey in relief as Laura smiles a screwed-lip grin. (Umm, Uli? You were the one who told Laura to tell on Jeffrey, let's not get all huggy-kissy now and then tell Laura that she must be happy that she made Jeffrey cry).

Actually, I thought there was a nice little cathartic circle here, as Jeffrey made someone else cry (Angela's mom, in case you haven't ever seen or read anything about the show) and now he must cry. Ahhhh, sweet justice.

But no time for reflection here!!! Back to work!!

There are many shots of everyone desperately trying to finish up their collections and Jeffrey tells Tim that he will not use the bizarro Vanessa Beecroft wigs in his collection to make up for the budget blowing. Tim nearly cries in relief that the runway show will be that much less flammable.

On to the runway! There is a strange shot of them walking across the street into the tent where there are no cars anywhere (I guess that's the magic of television, folks) and then we see everyone talk about how much this means to them, blah blah blah...I want clothes!! And celebrities!! And C-list Bravo "stars!"

Soon enough....

My impressions of the collections:

Michael: Despite walking out to the thunderous applause of the crowd, as befitting the winner of the Popularity Contest, Michael's collection was really disappointing. Everything was SO tight, SO short, SO booby-licious that it was too much. There was so much gilt that I was expecting King Midas himself to walk down the runway and turn the Queer Eye guys into blocks of bullion. I thought there should have been either something to make it wearable or something to make it ironic. There was neither, but I really have no fears about Michael going on to do things in the future, so I make peace with the fact that he won't win.

Laura: I thought Laura's collection was pretty fantastic. Yes, it was all eveningwear, but until recently, so was Badgley Mischka. And yes, it was very similar to a lot of what she already did in the show, but so was Uli's collection. I thought some of the dresses were really elegant and not so rib-baring as her other things. Honestly, for me it was between her collection and Jeffrey's for the win. But more on that later.

Uli: Ok, I know everyone loves Uli. People are swarming NinaGarcia and breathing down her neck to get Uli to design a line for them. She is a genius with prints. Her collection was very resort which is totally in right now. I get it. I just thought her collection was the same dress she showed in every. single. challenge. in the show. With a weird little tan jacket thing thrown in. She kept telling the judges that she wanted to show something other than prints, but I don't think the prints were the problem. I think the dress was the problem. The flowy dress with the little keyhole near the boobs. I wish she had used the prints to do pants for once! But that's just me, and I truly thought that she was going to win....

Jeffrey: Wow, I can't believe they chose Jeffrey. I mean, I thought he deserved to win and all, but wow. I totally thought Uli was going to win. I thought his collection was awesome. I found it really creative and hip. I loooveeed his dresses. Those, I would wear today if I could. But I can't because it's like 2 degrees out. Even the dresses that Fern Mallis thought looked out of place, the blue and silver minidresses. I loooved them. I would wear the skinny pants with the cute little jackets. I felt like he designed for someone I would like to look like, if I were cool and lived in the East Village before the NYU took over every building (as opposed to living in Dupont before every building becomes a Starbucks). Mmmm, yeah, I just loved. And I'm really glad that he won, because I think he earned it.

So, Jeffrey won. What did you all think about the finale? Do you totally disagree with me on the Uli-dress? Did you think Jeffrey deserved to win because he could totally use the free car in L.A.? Do you think Michael should move to New York and work for Michael Kors? Has Laura had her baby yet? Should Tim commission someone to design new outfits for the House pages?

Until next season!!

Always Remain Focused

Last Monday morning, I stumbled blearily out of bed towards the shower, grabbing my new bottles of L'Oreal Vive Pro shampoo and conditioner as I went.

Now in the shower, I pick up the first bottle, labeled "conditioner." Okay, fine. So I pick up the next bottle..."conditioner." Huh? And, since I can sometimes be a royal idiot in the mornings, I pick up both bottles and look at them together. Yup, that's right, I bought two bottles of conditioner. My mind races back to the day before...

I'm standing in Social Safeway (a grocery store in Georgetown which earned a reputation for being the cruis-iest supermarket in DC due to the high concentration of young singles looking for love and grub in the frozen foods aisles) and trying to decide on a new brand of shampoo. L'Oreal Vive Pro was recently named as a "Best of" in Allure magazine and has lots of pretty colored bottles.

So I am trying to decide if I want the one for "color treated hair" or the one for "highlighted hair" (pretty Sophie's Choice, huh?) when my cell phone rings.

"Ummm, so are you at Safeway?" my boyfriend asks.

I tell him yes, in my best "making HUGE hair care decisions here!!" voice.

"Sooooo, could you pick up some chips?" he asks.

In the background I hear the sounds of a football game and a boy's voice.

"Chhhhiiiiippppsssss!!!!"

"Okay....." I say into the receiver.

"Pssst, pssst, tell her to get salsa too." "Saaaallllllsssssaaaaa!!!!!"

"Ummmm...could you get some salsa too?" my boyfriend asks.

"Chhhhhiiipppppssss and saaaalllllsaaa!!!"

"Yeah, and uh, when do you think you can be back? Like, soon?" asks my boyfriend.

At this point, the finer distictions between color treatment and highlighting were moot. I shoved the bottles in my cart and took off at warp speed to the snack aisle, hoping only to get home before the boys resorted to eating my strawberry body scrub.

And that is how I ended up standing in my morning shower with a ton of conditioner and zero shampoo.

I rectified the situation later that day, deciding that my hair was "highlighted."

As for the product, I have to say that I don't love it. The conditioner especially is very thin and watery and does not coat my hair and I have been noticing tangles in my hair post-shower. And I never get tangles.

I also notice that my hair is very heavy at the scalp, whcih I don't like becuase it makes me feel like I forgot to wash the conditioner out of my hair.

Which is totally a possibility.

However, I am going to keep up the search for a better shampoo/conditioning duo. And turn off my phone the next time I go shopping.

D-DIY: DON'T Do It Yourself

So yesterday, I went to get a manicure.

This is a pretty big deal for me, since I'm one of those people who is all, "I can do it myself! I don't need some professional to paint my nails! Screw that!" I save my manicure time for functions like weddings and hearings that might actually be on regular C-SPAN (as opposed to C-SPAN 3).

Then I end up with nail polish all over my fingers, my boyfriend is opening a window and mock gasping for air from the fumes.

But, in case you hadn't noticed, I'm also kind of a trend-whore.

Not that there is anything wrong with that!!

So when I picked up a bottle of Sephora No. 11 nail polish, a dark brownish red color which is all the rage, I decided that a mistake would be more visible and hightailed it to a salon.

For all the Capitol City residents in the house, I go to Jessica B. in Georgetown.

While I waited, I noticed that the foreground of the nail polish selections were dominated by the dark colors. I spied several half used bottles of OPI Lincoln Park After Dark and Essie Wicked.

But, in my independent spirit, I was BYOBNP today.

As I said, Sephora's No. 11 is a deep brownish red color, closer to Wicked than to the Lincoln Park color. I imagine that it would be called "oxblood" in a J. Crew catalog.

As someone who always chooses pale colors, the sight of the dark fingers was quite startling. I was actually on the verge of disliking it, waving the trend-whore flag and retreating to Essie Ador-a-ball. But as I walked home, it began to grow on me. I felt very chic. I began to notice my hands a lot more. Actually, at dinner, my boyfriend asked why I kept staring at my fork-holding hand so much.

So...it was definitely worth going to a professional for this one...but I still plan on tackling the Ballet Slippers myself.

So THERE!

Eat it, Tim Russert!

So this morning, I was sipping some coffee and gearing up to watch the midterm election smackdown-fest on Meet the Press while checking out some of the comments on the blog.

And then coffee goes spraying all over my apartment.

Apparently I was mentioned in Marie Claire magazine?!?!?

This clearly necessitated a dash to CVS in my peejays.

And there it was:

"WASTE YOUR TIME HERE"

I cannot tell you how flattering it is that someone considers my site worthy of their procrastination time.

So...welcome Marie Claire readers!!

I promise to try keep you from work you should be doing in the future.

PS I'll try to post a copy of the article here, if Blogger EVER lets me post pictures again. Sniff. Otherwise, check out the November issue of Marie Claire on the newstands with Sarah Michelle Gellar on the cover. Page 56!