Ten Things That I Really Hate About the Rachel Zoe Project, but that Don't Stop Me From Watching it Every Week

Lately, each week I engage in an exercise of pure self flaggelation...I record and watch The Rachel Zoe Project on Bravo.

It is torture for me because I really kind of hate everyone on the show, but am mesmerized by the clothes and the celebrity name dropping. I want to like it in an ironic way, but that's not really it. So, I've decided to purge some of my demons by listing my top 10 things that infuriate me about this show, but not enough to just stop watching...

10. They refer to celebrities only by first name, as if we and everyone else in their world are all that familiar with them. News flash! Even in Hollywood, there is more than one "Kate."

9. Every Starbucks order seems to require at least three cups of varying materials. Why?!?

8. Rachel and her staff insist on treating every event as if it is a national disaster and compare themselves to brain surgeons. I understand taking your job seriously, but really? I know actual brain surgeons who are way more relaxed than these people. At the end of the day, there is literally no way someone will die with or without Rachel Zoe's intervention.

7. Oh, the improper and overuse of the word "literally."

6. For someone who loves clothes so much, Rachel seems to spend a disproportionate amount of time in a fluffy white bathrobe. PS How is it always so fluffy?

5. Rachel constantly attributes illnesses to her "extreme stress." Season 1, it was a possible ulcer. Season 2, it was vertigo... Ulcers and vertigo are real diseases that have actual identifiable etiologies which can be diagnosed and treated by a real physician. Not some rando woman who happens to have an office, a pressed lab coat and is called Dr. [insert first name here].

4. I am baffled by the importance placed on her wedding anniversary, which does seem to fall during her busiest and filmiest time every year. Just celebrate a week or two later.

3. The nebulously vague references to "betrayals" and "things that happened" between Rachel and others, like Nicole Ritchie and ex-assistant Taylor without actually giving us any information but then saying nasty things and wishing them ill. Until Brad up and calls Taylor a thief, which is practically slander.

2. It's just plain criminal to take up a table at Babbo when you are clearly not going to eat anything.

1. That floor and wall composed entirely of shoes.

There it is...I feel a little better. At least until after I watch the season finale tonight.