Oh Zoe.

For a little light reading with your coffee this morning, I recommend heading over to an article printed in the New York Times Magazine section this Sunday about stylist extraordinaire Rachel Zoe.


And by "stylist extraordinaire," I mean, freakishly skinny wrinkly woman who has some how transformed actresses into walking billboards for her friends and managed to talk them into dieting until they practically make Holocaust victims look rubenesque.


Some of the highlights:


Rachel will only drink Starbucks coffee. Even in Paris. A city with one of the greatest cafe cultures in the world. But, if you don't drink it there, you may as well just be a terrorist and hate America. You pinko Commie freak.


Zoe brusquely sends back a plate of steamed vegetables at a Paris restaurant because there is a small dollop of some kind of sauce. Rachel, apparently, cannot tolerate sauce or calories of any kind.


Also consumed in the article: diet Snapple and tea.



Rachel is in shock to hear that vegetables actually DO contain calories.

Readers are informed that her last name is pronounced "Zoh," like "No." However, when she was just a babe in Jersey, people pronounced her middle name "ZOH-ee" like everyone else. Oh, she also dropped the surname "Rosenzweig."

Clients will not be dressed in any color that does not flatter the stylist herself.


We discover the mystery of the Marchesa explosion. It's what you thought. Harvey Weinstein decided that people should wear his girlfriend's clothes and Zoe made it happen.


Her ring tone is "Riders on the Storm" by the Doors. 'Cause that's not cliche in a look-at-how-highbrow-recherche-I-am way.


Nicole Kidman is one demanding crazy person.


The author of the article does not seem to disguise a sense of amusement and distaste for Zoe. Great reading though....

photos courtesy of nytimes.com