Tuesday, April 18, 2006

She blinded me with science!

Well, not really, but I'm pretty sure I could blind someone with my shockingly pale legs! I am naturally VERY white and am totally incapable of tanning. Yup, I'm one of the lucky few who can go from white, to burned to a crisp, to totally white again.

Normally, I can revel in my pale skin and disdain at all those who must go to tanning beds. I wear SPF-a million and simply stay away from colors that tend to match my skin tone (off-white is my enemy). However, every spring and summer, I read about all the latest new developments in self tanners. There are the spray booths, the foams, the gels, those bizarre pills you can take. And every year, like clockwork, I fall prey to trying something new out. I have no aspirations to being golden brown to the color where I could actually wear coral nail polish or something, I just need a little something to take the edge off the pasty tone my legs accumulate over the winter.

So, this year, I have fallen prey to the hype surrounding Jergens Natural Glow Daily Moisturizer. Last year, in what was undoubtedly the greatest marketing ploy in history, Jergens only made about three bottles of the stuff and had product placement everywhere! There was a huge craze and people started hoarding it like there was some Y2K self-tanner conspiracy out there. Friends who were able to get a hold of it raved about it.

I like that it comes in a variety for fair skin tones (although there wasn't a "for those of you who are so pale that people can see your veins and mistakenly tell you that you have pen marks on your face"). However, I am fearful. Yes, terribly afraid of the streaky freakish orange tints that I have been in the past. But I will be brave. I will report back if children start crying when I walk by.