Project Runway: Immediately Dismissed

So this was it. The episode we've all been waiting for. And it was totally anti-climactic.

Pffffftttttt. That's my excitement balloon deflating. Oh well...on to the rehash!

Previouslies: They showed us scenes for this episode where a designer gets kicked off! Oh, and I think there was a competition, some dogs, and someone wearing a bubble skirt? Maybe that was some kind of acid flashback or something.

We open with some morning scenes of people getting ready and it's onto the runway where Heidi tells us that they will actually make the model selection more interesting by making them chose randomly again! Things (I mean, real live skinny people) get shuffled and Alison's model gets axed. So sad. But not really.

Then Tim/Heidi tells them about the challenge, which is to make a three piece outfit for Macy's INC line but they will have to pitch ideas and work in teams of three a la the Miss Universe episode. These producers are just batty for teams! It saves time on the runway to show Angela's manic phases.

Here's my question though, have these people EVER watched the show? Why do they always look SOOO surprised when they have the "design for the corporate sponsor and get the outfit in three stores" challenge? I don't get it. It happens EVERY FRICKING SEASON. Stop looking so shocked!

Moving on!

They sketch, they pitch, they ominously foreshadow with Bonnie and Robert saying how totally in the bag this is because they work for big companies. Team leaders are chosen are the teams are as follows.

Team 2G2F (too gay to function, Kayne and Robert) with a little dash of looney Vincent.

Team Trying to Deal with Angela (Laura and Michael)

Team Painfully Hipster (Keith, Jeffrey and Alison)

Team Making Me Nervous (Bonnie, Bradley and Uli)

They go shopping and Keith wheels and deals his way to an $18 discount. Will this get him kicked out??? Probably not.

Okay, back to the Sweatshop where they cut and sew and all that other good stuff.

I'm cutting to the good stuff now!!

So back at the sponsored Atlas apartments, Kayne (sporting a totally new hairstyle, the big city changes people) starts talking about how Keith is hoarding patternmaking books under his bed. I've heard he also has a tell-tale heart under the floorboards. Vincent, who should be all over this, sort of shrugs. Robert gets into it in his tight white tank top and demands to see the producer.

Apparently, this type of contraband were seized when they entered Atlas lockdown and are not permitted. Did they also take away their meds? Angela looks like she is in desperate need of some Lithium, Bradley's been off the Adderall for way too long, Vincent needs a little Thorazine to silence the voices in his head, and Laura could use some birth control pills to pump up her boobs a little. But seriously, how did Keith not know that this would get him kicked out? Do I get to bring my copy of the Constitution to the House floor? Well, yeah. And it's pocket sized!! Okay, bad example. Nevermind!

Tim comes by like the Grim Reaper (clipboard instead of scythe) and informs Keith while he is sitting on Vincent's bed (with Vincent right there) that he's taking a long walk off a short runway. Keith is obviously humiliated and quite honest about it with everyone else afterwards, which kind of deflates Kayne, who tries to make Keith acknowledge that what he did was deeply and morally wrong. No dice for Kayne though.

Onward.

Alison and Jeffrey have to finish the outfit and do a pretty damn fine job of it. Angela is doing her best impersonation of that crazy bird lady from Mary Poppins (impersonation, hah!) and making a trillion rosettes!! OMG!! OMG!!! She is totally batshit crazy. Laura and Michael talk her into using them as buttons on the pants and jackets which actually ends up looking good, but why guys??? Just let her hang herself!! Get up on the runway and point to the bubble pantaloons bedecked with puffballs and say, "You don't want this on the final three shows. Peace out." It's soooo easy.

But I guess they had integrity or something. Whatever.

Also, Vincent is making faces at Robert's outfit, saying it looks awful. Obviously this is someone who does not understand karma and will now receive bad luck in collaborations to come.

Bonnie's team scenes are totally dominated by Bradley who obviously loves the wake and bake. Really? You don't remember why you got picked last? Did you watch last week? So, no, I don't think it's the beard. Lay off the bong, dude.

Runway!

Only four outfits, and it's clear which were the best and the worst. Alison and Jeffrey's was really cool and looked great. The skinny pants are really in, the jacket moved well, it just looked great. But totally was not for the INC customer. Therefore, Angela's outfit, which did look cool on the model with a cropped jacket, long bootlegged pants and pink tshirt was the clear winner of the challenge. It just looked like it belonged in Macy's (that's not really compliment though). Yuk it up now Angela, Wendy Pepper won the Banana Republic Challenge the first season and look at her now. Yup, she's still in Middleburg and a joke on blogs everywhere.

I felt worst for Jeffrey who clearly is not a morning person and put it best when he was all, "Greeaaattt, can I go home now?"

Robert and Bonnie's outfits were just weird. Bonnie's brown pants made the model look really fat. Like really fat. How does that happen? And then there was that mumsy heavy tunic. Whaaaaa? Robert's just looked totally ill fitting like the model's ass shrunk in the skirt, but when she was heavier, she bent over, ripped the slit, then used her office stapler to tack it back together. I also didn't like the bottom of the shirt, it looked like it was trimmed right before the show. Weird. It was like Project Twilight Zone.

So, in the end, I'm glad Robert is staying, but I feel bad for Bonnie, because Angela deserves to go home. This instant.

Maybe Michael Kors will revoke her immunity if she makes one more bubble skirt. We can always hope!

As always, check out Blogging Project Runway for lots of recaps, interviews, and pictures. Also Tim's Take for his brutally honest and oh-so-on-point opinion.

It would be so awesome if Blogger ever let me post pictures again....