A Tale of Two Beauty Departments - Cont'd

After the big scores at Bergdorf's, I convinced my mother to walk two blocks south to hit up Bendel's.

I swore to all that is holy to me (namely, caffeine and Prada) that we would only go to the beauty section as I wanted to try out the Laura Mercier Tinted Moisturizer. We were both a little tired, hungry and be-blistered.

Nota bene on foundation for me: I currently use Vincent Longo Healthy Fluid Foundation in Porcelain. They played a mean trick a few years back where it disappeared from the market to "reformulate" and I had to try other foundations. But it's back, baby!

However, when summer rolls around, I find myself longing for something light and easy, hence the desire to check out the Tinted Moisturizer. And I hear it's all the rage in Paris.

So we roll into Bendel's and I am immediately struck by how much a beauty floor resembles (at least what I imagine) a marketplace in Marrakesh with vendors reaching and jumping out from every direction trying to lure you into their stall.

So I sidle up to the Laura Mercier counter and start poking around. Then the sales guy sidles up to me. I ask about the moisturizer and he looks like he has just won the lottery. "Let me put some on you!" he squeals.

I glance at my mother, and reply, "Well, aren't you pretty hungry Mom? I don't want to take too long." As I say this I shoot her my best "let's get out of here!!" vibe. She says, "We can stay if you want to."

So much for mother-daughter mental telepathy.

So I sit. The guy starts rubbing my face with cleansers and gook, trying to sell me some primer with his totally rehearsed spiel. I notice an older saleswoman peering over his shoulder as he smears. Great...a newbie. He lauches into the ad copy on the Perfecting Water (didn't Nature perfect water on it's own? What with the two hydrogens and the oxygen, there's not that much room for anything else). And he's telling me that it's pH balanced.

Okay, now I get snarky.

"What's the pH?" I inquire. He looks totally befuddled, but regains his composure.

"It's balanced."

Okay, now I'm super-snarky and I whip out my totally obnoxious science nerd skilz.

"No, I mean, what is the pH? It's a number that describes the acid or base quality of the substance."

Pause. "Weeeell...when your skin is not pH balanced, the water will put it back in balance."

I'm guessing my chemistry professor might have a few things to say about that one.

Then he puts on the Tinted Moisturizer.

I glance over at my mother, who has a grimace on her face that I haven't seen since I tried to go to school looking like Alicia Silverstone in Clueless. He hands me a mirror.

GOOD GOD! I look ill. No, seriously, pale and clammy looking. Like I had the stomach flu.

He tried to show me that it would be better with a little blush (picking a pooey brown color that my mother later remarked made me look "dirty") but to no avail. I hightailed it out of there with the "I need to see it in natural light" excuse.

Ugh! Back to the Longo counter I go!

I'm considering experimenting with the Longo Dew Finish foundation version...has anyone tried?